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Offical church of Morphile

Sarcobite

Well-known member
Author
Oh we praise you morphile, slayer of duck libreals, builder of great walls of text, condoner of Pinochet.

Let your viewpoints always trigger the thin skinned, let your typed hordes of words ever dismantle arguemants, let your might be unquestioned and your debating skill unparrealed.
All hail Morphile, slayer of duck liberals, the one true king of news and politics!
 
Oh we praise you morphile, slayer of duck libreals, builder of great walls of text, condoner of Pinochet.

Let your viewpoints always trigger the thin skinned, let your typed hordes of words ever dismantle arguemants, let your might be unquestioned and your debating skill unparrealed.
All hail Morphile, slayer of duck liberals, the one true king of news and politics!
Seeing you think his arguments are good, let me debunk that using his type of reasoning...

Rather than engage in a point-by-point response to the textual interpretation of Mr. Morphile's claims, I want to respond to the more general issue at hand. Perhaps before going on, I should describe Morphile to you. Morphile is careless, stubborn, and crapulous. Furthermore, he yearns to rob us of our lives, our health, our honor, and our belongings.

If we were to let Morphile get away with insulting my intelligence, that would be a gross miscarriage of justice. If anything will free us from the shackles of his beastly personal attacks, it's knowledge of the world as it really is. It's knowledge that the one thing that's central to all of Morphile's audacious remonstrations is a desire to create division in the name of diversity. I call this the New Parochialism. The old parochialism was concerned only with filling the air with recrimination and rancor. Although that was bad enough, some people doubt that Morphile's canards are all too often clad in the devious garb of conformism. Sadly, I can't seem to convince such people otherwise. Regardless, let's move on.

If I'm not mistaken, Morphile just blathered something to the effect of how governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments. Alas, I don't speak Crazy. Maybe if Morphile could translate what he stated into English, we'd be able to determine if he was simply trying to deny that the problem with him is not only that he wants to engage in the trafficking of human beings. The problem with him is also that he's a sanguinary maggot. I argue that it's reasonable to exclude a sanguinary maggot from proper society; don't you agree? Whether you do or not, I'm convinced that Morphile will resolve a moral failure with an immoral solution as soon as our backs are turned. No, I'm not in tinfoil-hat land; I have abundant evidence from reliable sources that this is the case. For instance, Morphile undoubtedly embarrassed himself by ceremoniously announcing that the Queen of England heads up the international drug cartel. Morphile is now in full retreat, shifting from clear prose to mumbled nonsense. I maintain he doesn't want anyone to know that he says that we should abandon the institutionalized and revered concept of democracy. As usual, he can be counted on to wrap every actual fact in six layers of embellishment. The truth is that Morphile posits his prognoses as anti-factionalism. In reality, though, they're not anti-factionalism at all but rather post-factionalism. That is, they're a step beyond factionalism in that Morphile uses them as an excuse to bad-mouth worthy causes.

Leaving aside the behavior of other caustic, parviscient chumps, Morphile is like a stray pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between Morphile and a pigeon is that Morphile intends to ransack people's homes. That's why Morphile wants us to think of him as a do-gooder. Keep in mind, though, that he wants to "do good" with other people's money and often with other people's lives. If Morphile really wanted to be a do-gooder, he could start by admitting that an unholy alliance of amateurish jobsworths and self-pitying con artists has been instrumental in devising increasingly selfish ways to promote presentism's traits as normative values to be embraced. I won't dwell on that except to direct your attention to the brainless manner in which Morphile has been trying to control what we do and how we do it.

Morphile keeps trying to impose a "glass ceiling" that limits our opportunities for promotions in most jobs. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, he will truly succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with snappish slackers, Morphile's gofers, or anyone else who fails to realize that we ought to ponder the lessons and examples of the 19th century's abolitionist movement. In particular, we should consider the abolitionists' deep commitment and unrelenting dedication as well as their moral fervor and powerfully cogent wording, speeches, and direct action. I propose we expand upon those and make the associated lessons and guidelines usable in today's world, emphasizing that I wonder if Morphile really believes the things he says. He knows they're not true, doesn't he? In other words, does Morphile realize he's more pestilential than a parvanimous spouter? I'll answer that question later in this letter, after I first bring up a point about how if you want truth, you have to struggle for it. This letter represents my struggle, my attempt at working together towards a shared vision. It is also my soapbox for informing the community at large that Morphile's blandishments are rife with contradictions and difficulties; they're totally intransigent, meet no objective criteria, and are unsuited for a supposedly educated population. And as if that weren't enough, Morphile has been dragging everything that is truly great into the gutter for as long as I can remember. He'll likely continue doing such niddering things until either there's a massive uprising or the Sun expands to vaporize the Earth, whichever is sooner. Either way, Morphile maliciously defames and damagingly misrepresents everyone and everything around him. There's a word for that: libel.

Let's try to catch our breaths and look carefully at how Morphile has been gearing up to combine the most sordid avarice with the most invincible hatred of the very people who tolerate and enrich him. Then let's examine how Morphile tries to prevent people from hearing the truth about how just because he and his vassals don't like being labeled as "pugnacious, contentious money-worshippers" or "spleeny loan sharks" doesn't mean the shoe doesn't fit. I like how he will destroy our sense of safety in the places we ordinarily imagine we can flee to. I kid, I kid! Alas, the truth is far grimmer: Morphile screams and cries whenever he's prevented from bringing discord, confusion, and frustration into our personal and public lives. I avouch that if he stopped acting like such a big baby, maybe then he'd see that the acid test for his "kinder, gentler" new subliminal psywar campaigns should be, "Do they still lower our standard of living?" If the answer is yes then we can conclude that Morphile claims that Elvis is alive and well and living in Tweed, Ontario. That claim illustrates a serious reasoning fallacy, one that is pandemic in his pranks. Then again, I, not being one of the many unruly jargonauts of this world, can't make heads or tails of Morphile's reinterpretations of historic events. I mean, does he want to restructure the social, political, and economic relationships that exist throughout our entire society, or doesn't he?

Morphile's shell games are eerily similar to those promoted by madmen such as Pol Pot. What's scary, though, is that their extollment of zabernism has been ratcheted up a few notches from anything Pol Pot ever conjured up. I may not be perfect, but at least I'm not afraid to say that if society were a beer bottle—something, I believe, that Morphile holds in high regard—he would indeed be the nauseating bit at the bottom that only the homeless like to drink. He thinks it's good that his scribblings take us all on an absolutely reckless ride into the unknown. It is difficult to know how to respond to such monumentally misplaced values, but let's try this: His catch-phrases are not only voluble but divisive. They are divisive at a time when we need unity. They are moonstruck at a time when we need to come together to tell our shared stories about how if Morphile bites me I will bite back.

What is the milieu in which bloodthirsty, jaded-to-the-core palookas reinforce the impression that nasty, unstable vagabonds—as opposed to Morphile's fellow travelers—are striving to grasp at straws, trying to find increasingly feckless ways to create some quarrelsome, pseudo-psychological profile of me to discredit my opinions? It is the underworld of conspiracy theory, a subculture in which the most unambitious miscreants I've ever seen share fantasies of fighting heroically against a huge conspiracy that will do everything possible to keep orgulous wankers wanton and malefic when you least expect it. Since Morphile claims to know more than the rest of us, I'm sure he's aware that by writing this letter, I am indisputably sticking my head far above the parapet. The big danger is that Morphile will retaliate against me. He'll most likely try to force me to hang myself by the neck until dead although another possibility is that we must understand that no matter how many tantrums and hissy fits he throws, it won't change the fact that his purpose is not to enlighten but to deceive. And we must formulate that understanding into as clear and cogent a message as possible. He claims that he is a champion of liberty and individual expression. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

Morphile is guilty of at least one criminal offense. In addition, he frequently exhibits less formal criminal behavior such as deliberate and even gleeful cruelty, explosive behavior, and a burning desire to embark on wholesale torture and slaughter of innocent civilians. Before you declare me snarky, let me assert that he has so frequently lied about how Leninism is the only alternative to Jacobinism that some weaker-minded people are starting to believe it. We need to explain to such people that Morphile's analects are incoherent. They are inconsistent. And yes, they are downright noisome. That's why I think that anyone—you or I or a Martian who just arrived in a flying saucer—who wants to free people from the spell of misoneism that Morphile has cast over them should realize that Morphile craves more power. I say we should give him more power—preferably, 10,000 volts of it.

Morphile proclaims that arriving at a true state of comprehension is too difficult and/or time-consuming. However, he says that unfounded attacks on character, loads of hyperbole, and fallacious information are the best way to make a point. Such statements are not just wrong; they're worse than wrong. They reinforce a dangerous and insidious but sadly common misunderstanding among many people. They disguise the fact that he has been upping the ante considerably. Alas, Morphile doesn't stop there. In fact, he can't stop there because he's determined to disprove that he has been peddling all sorts of half-baked and discredited theories. For example, Morphile insists that everyone and everything discriminates against him—including the writing on the bathroom stalls. As if that weren't bad enough, only through education can individuals gain the independent tools they need to bear the flambeau of freedom. But the first step is to acknowledge that his occasional demonstrations of benevolence are not genuine. Nor are Morphile's promises. In fact, he always looks the other way when one of his aides-de-camp gets it in his head to effectuate the downfall of all that is decent and civilized. Apparently, the principle laid down by Jean-Marie Collot d'Herbois during the French Reign of Terror still holds true today: Tout est permis à quiconque agit dans le sens de la révolution. Let me close by reminding you that the statements I made about Mr. Morphile in this letter are in earnest. I will not equivocate. I will not excuse. I will not retreat a single inch. And I will be heard.
 
MORPHILE IS THE CHOSEN
DEATH TO THE NON BELIEBERS
IN THE NAME OF MORPHILE


Yes I'm done now
 
Seeing you think his arguments are good, let me debunk that using his type of reasoning...

Rather than engage in a point-by-point response to the textual interpretation of Mr. Morphile's claims, I want to respond to the more general issue at hand. Perhaps before going on, I should describe Morphile to you. Morphile is careless, stubborn, and crapulous. Furthermore, he yearns to rob us of our lives, our health, our honor, and our belongings.

If we were to let Morphile get away with insulting my intelligence, that would be a gross miscarriage of justice. If anything will free us from the shackles of his beastly personal attacks, it's knowledge of the world as it really is. It's knowledge that the one thing that's central to all of Morphile's audacious remonstrations is a desire to create division in the name of diversity. I call this the New Parochialism. The old parochialism was concerned only with filling the air with recrimination and rancor. Although that was bad enough, some people doubt that Morphile's canards are all too often clad in the devious garb of conformism. Sadly, I can't seem to convince such people otherwise. Regardless, let's move on.

If I'm not mistaken, Morphile just blathered something to the effect of how governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments. Alas, I don't speak Crazy. Maybe if Morphile could translate what he stated into English, we'd be able to determine if he was simply trying to deny that the problem with him is not only that he wants to engage in the trafficking of human beings. The problem with him is also that he's a sanguinary maggot. I argue that it's reasonable to exclude a sanguinary maggot from proper society; don't you agree? Whether you do or not, I'm convinced that Morphile will resolve a moral failure with an immoral solution as soon as our backs are turned. No, I'm not in tinfoil-hat land; I have abundant evidence from reliable sources that this is the case. For instance, Morphile undoubtedly embarrassed himself by ceremoniously announcing that the Queen of England heads up the international drug cartel. Morphile is now in full retreat, shifting from clear prose to mumbled nonsense. I maintain he doesn't want anyone to know that he says that we should abandon the institutionalized and revered concept of democracy. As usual, he can be counted on to wrap every actual fact in six layers of embellishment. The truth is that Morphile posits his prognoses as anti-factionalism. In reality, though, they're not anti-factionalism at all but rather post-factionalism. That is, they're a step beyond factionalism in that Morphile uses them as an excuse to bad-mouth worthy causes.

Leaving aside the behavior of other caustic, parviscient chumps, Morphile is like a stray pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between Morphile and a pigeon is that Morphile intends to ransack people's homes. That's why Morphile wants us to think of him as a do-gooder. Keep in mind, though, that he wants to "do good" with other people's money and often with other people's lives. If Morphile really wanted to be a do-gooder, he could start by admitting that an unholy alliance of amateurish jobsworths and self-pitying con artists has been instrumental in devising increasingly selfish ways to promote presentism's traits as normative values to be embraced. I won't dwell on that except to direct your attention to the brainless manner in which Morphile has been trying to control what we do and how we do it.

Morphile keeps trying to impose a "glass ceiling" that limits our opportunities for promotions in most jobs. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, he will truly succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with snappish slackers, Morphile's gofers, or anyone else who fails to realize that we ought to ponder the lessons and examples of the 19th century's abolitionist movement. In particular, we should consider the abolitionists' deep commitment and unrelenting dedication as well as their moral fervor and powerfully cogent wording, speeches, and direct action. I propose we expand upon those and make the associated lessons and guidelines usable in today's world, emphasizing that I wonder if Morphile really believes the things he says. He knows they're not true, doesn't he? In other words, does Morphile realize he's more pestilential than a parvanimous spouter? I'll answer that question later in this letter, after I first bring up a point about how if you want truth, you have to struggle for it. This letter represents my struggle, my attempt at working together towards a shared vision. It is also my soapbox for informing the community at large that Morphile's blandishments are rife with contradictions and difficulties; they're totally intransigent, meet no objective criteria, and are unsuited for a supposedly educated population. And as if that weren't enough, Morphile has been dragging everything that is truly great into the gutter for as long as I can remember. He'll likely continue doing such niddering things until either there's a massive uprising or the Sun expands to vaporize the Earth, whichever is sooner. Either way, Morphile maliciously defames and damagingly misrepresents everyone and everything around him. There's a word for that: libel.

Let's try to catch our breaths and look carefully at how Morphile has been gearing up to combine the most sordid avarice with the most invincible hatred of the very people who tolerate and enrich him. Then let's examine how Morphile tries to prevent people from hearing the truth about how just because he and his vassals don't like being labeled as "pugnacious, contentious money-worshippers" or "spleeny loan sharks" doesn't mean the shoe doesn't fit. I like how he will destroy our sense of safety in the places we ordinarily imagine we can flee to. I kid, I kid! Alas, the truth is far grimmer: Morphile screams and cries whenever he's prevented from bringing discord, confusion, and frustration into our personal and public lives. I avouch that if he stopped acting like such a big baby, maybe then he'd see that the acid test for his "kinder, gentler" new subliminal psywar campaigns should be, "Do they still lower our standard of living?" If the answer is yes then we can conclude that Morphile claims that Elvis is alive and well and living in Tweed, Ontario. That claim illustrates a serious reasoning fallacy, one that is pandemic in his pranks. Then again, I, not being one of the many unruly jargonauts of this world, can't make heads or tails of Morphile's reinterpretations of historic events. I mean, does he want to restructure the social, political, and economic relationships that exist throughout our entire society, or doesn't he?

Morphile's shell games are eerily similar to those promoted by madmen such as Pol Pot. What's scary, though, is that their extollment of zabernism has been ratcheted up a few notches from anything Pol Pot ever conjured up. I may not be perfect, but at least I'm not afraid to say that if society were a beer bottle—something, I believe, that Morphile holds in high regard—he would indeed be the nauseating bit at the bottom that only the homeless like to drink. He thinks it's good that his scribblings take us all on an absolutely reckless ride into the unknown. It is difficult to know how to respond to such monumentally misplaced values, but let's try this: His catch-phrases are not only voluble but divisive. They are divisive at a time when we need unity. They are moonstruck at a time when we need to come together to tell our shared stories about how if Morphile bites me I will bite back.

What is the milieu in which bloodthirsty, jaded-to-the-core palookas reinforce the impression that nasty, unstable vagabonds—as opposed to Morphile's fellow travelers—are striving to grasp at straws, trying to find increasingly feckless ways to create some quarrelsome, pseudo-psychological profile of me to discredit my opinions? It is the underworld of conspiracy theory, a subculture in which the most unambitious miscreants I've ever seen share fantasies of fighting heroically against a huge conspiracy that will do everything possible to keep orgulous wankers wanton and malefic when you least expect it. Since Morphile claims to know more than the rest of us, I'm sure he's aware that by writing this letter, I am indisputably sticking my head far above the parapet. The big danger is that Morphile will retaliate against me. He'll most likely try to force me to hang myself by the neck until dead although another possibility is that we must understand that no matter how many tantrums and hissy fits he throws, it won't change the fact that his purpose is not to enlighten but to deceive. And we must formulate that understanding into as clear and cogent a message as possible. He claims that he is a champion of liberty and individual expression. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

Morphile is guilty of at least one criminal offense. In addition, he frequently exhibits less formal criminal behavior such as deliberate and even gleeful cruelty, explosive behavior, and a burning desire to embark on wholesale torture and slaughter of innocent civilians. Before you declare me snarky, let me assert that he has so frequently lied about how Leninism is the only alternative to Jacobinism that some weaker-minded people are starting to believe it. We need to explain to such people that Morphile's analects are incoherent. They are inconsistent. And yes, they are downright noisome. That's why I think that anyone—you or I or a Martian who just arrived in a flying saucer—who wants to free people from the spell of misoneism that Morphile has cast over them should realize that Morphile craves more power. I say we should give him more power—preferably, 10,000 volts of it.

Morphile proclaims that arriving at a true state of comprehension is too difficult and/or time-consuming. However, he says that unfounded attacks on character, loads of hyperbole, and fallacious information are the best way to make a point. Such statements are not just wrong; they're worse than wrong. They reinforce a dangerous and insidious but sadly common misunderstanding among many people. They disguise the fact that he has been upping the ante considerably. Alas, Morphile doesn't stop there. In fact, he can't stop there because he's determined to disprove that he has been peddling all sorts of half-baked and discredited theories. For example, Morphile insists that everyone and everything discriminates against him—including the writing on the bathroom stalls. As if that weren't bad enough, only through education can individuals gain the independent tools they need to bear the flambeau of freedom. But the first step is to acknowledge that his occasional demonstrations of benevolence are not genuine. Nor are Morphile's promises. In fact, he always looks the other way when one of his aides-de-camp gets it in his head to effectuate the downfall of all that is decent and civilized. Apparently, the principle laid down by Jean-Marie Collot d'Herbois during the French Reign of Terror still holds true today: Tout est permis à quiconque agit dans le sens de la révolution. Let me close by reminding you that the statements I made about Mr. Morphile in this letter are in earnest. I will not equivocate. I will not excuse. I will not retreat a single inch. And I will be heard.
Please never write like this
ever again
 
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