Mashadarof402
Member
"What does she want?" asked Pacifica, taking the hologram projector. It chirped within her hand, and a scrolling of the old language began to move past her fiend of vision.
I do believe you mean field of vision.
"What does she want?" asked Pacifica, taking the hologram projector. It chirped within her hand, and a scrolling of the old language began to move past her fiend of vision.
Thanks.I do believe you mean field of vision.
Thanks.
So... anything to say, or should I just put in a new chapter?
Frankly speaking, I'm not too sure how to do the 'soldiers visiting hell thing'. Part of it is that Lamulis has dealt with mortal visitors before and knows how to keep them chill. Adding in to the fact that Pacifica made sure to go to a less 'scenic' route, and these are trained veterans....Well, other than the soldiers being remarkably chill about visiting hell and not gawking, this is pretty much a buildup chapter so there's not really much to say about it.
Other than given the timing of the new patient's arrival, it seems like she was expected.
Frankly speaking, I'm not too sure how to do the 'soldiers visiting hell thing'. Part of it is that Lamulis has dealt with mortal visitors before and knows how to keep them chill. Adding in to the fact that Pacifica made sure to go to a less 'scenic' route, and these are trained veterans....
But yes, you are right. I likely wrote them as being way too chill. I just couldn't think of a way to write them down as being shocked and surprised by hell and not putting it off as... preachy? Cliche? Stupid? Tripe?
showing nervousness?If they're former veterans, then rather than being preachy or anything, just have them nervous. Not scared witless nervous, but tense nervous, as if expecting shit to go down at any moment. This is clearly not Earth anymore, it's literally an alien landscape and by the warnings Pacifica has given, practically enemy territory or at least hostile environments. Some might relax with the hospitality, but most I think will be understandably on edge. Tour in Iraq kind of on edge.
You're right. In hindsight, since they're mercenaries protecting their principle, it was dumb to let Pacifica lead from the front. They should have surrounded her, or put her in the center of the convoy. Probably a cordon to prevent anyone from getting too close.Things like that yes. Basically, the best image you can use is that of a patrol in a recently taken stretch of city.
They're not supposed to shoot without being shot at, what with all the civilian population around, but at the same time, there's that undercurrent of tension where they can expect to be attacked at any moment.
And you have to remember, they're not there for their sake. They're there to provide HVT protection.
If you want to keep them as is, you can have Pacifica exercise her golden biceps and use speechcraft to get them to relax. But that probably goes against the idea of bringing them in the first place, so your mileage varies.
You're right. In hindsight, since they're mercenaries protecting their principle, it was dumb to let Pacifica lead from the front. They should have surrounded her, or put her in the center of the convoy. Probably a cordon to prevent anyone from getting too close.Things like that yes. Basically, the best image you can use is that of a patrol in a recently taken stretch of city.
They're not supposed to shoot without being shot at, what with all the civilian population around, but at the same time, there's that undercurrent of tension where they can expect to be attacked at any moment.
And you have to remember, they're not there for their sake. They're there to provide HVT protection.
If you want to keep them as is, you can have Pacifica exercise her golden biceps and use speechcraft to get them to relax. But that probably goes against the idea of bringing them in the first place, so your mileage varies.
Please don't take this wrong... But have you posted the link?It's early still story wise. A slice of life exalt works.
As for it being boring, there's no harm condensing the boring parts down a bit if you feel it's bogging down.
On the other hand, if you want battles... it's Malfeas isn't it? Hive of scum and villainy when they're not entertaining a new GSP.
Being mugged by the local gang is always a possibility if you want to showcase the difference between mundane soldiers and whatever the denizens of Malfeas can cook up.
Please don't take this wrong... But have you posted the link?
Yes. I do.On SB you mean? Oh, I wasn't aware that you still wanted me to do that. I can put it up if you want.
Yes. I do.
Yeah, and for things...And done. Hopefully you'll get more traffic.
Her eyes glowed yellow, while her skin was a brownish red, faintly glowing in the green light, cracks of yellow glowing through it, like magma showing up beneath volcanic rock.
She was short, half a head shorter than Pacifica, and currently, she was washing down the half a dozen cakes she had just eaten with tea.
"Hello," said the demonic-looking girl, sippingdownher tea again. "So we're finally talking. Good. Lamulis said that your talents included medicine. Tell me, how good are you?"
She thought back onto what she had been doing in the homeless shelter,
Victims have symptoms starting with coughing, weakness, constant fatigue, fevers, and eventually a collapse and a coma."
a yellowish and greenish beast.
and then die, in 15 minutes.
Bullets, knives and swords only slow them down.andYou need to either destroy them wholesale or use fire.
Butbynow, we don't have a nation of our own.
But there has been grumbling
The refugee camp has already become a quarantine zone, with no one allowed in or out.
My resources are running dry, and the disease is still spreading, somehow.
And testing for it is money drain, since the test itself costs money, and the disease may not show up for weeks or months."
Blazing Fire of Molten Stone just shrugged her shoulders. "Well, you've got to see it to believe it.
I'm going to snap your fingers, and over the course of months, you're going to be rich.
And then they have to do what you tell themto.
"Money, social status, skills, beauty, physical strength, land.... whatever you want. If its possible for a human being to get it with hard work and time, I can grant it to you."
Molten Stone ate the last of the cakes. "So we have a deal? I grant you, or someone of your choice, money and power. In return, give me their health back."
They were seated around a podium, still snacking on the remainder of the banquet,soldiers still eating the weird food in hell, greenish light pouring over them from a chandelier on top.
"I've seen shit before, in a short stint in a syrian refugee camp.
All sorts of nasties that you usually get aspirin or rubbing alcohol for that turns to shit when you don't have any.
I give you that... but these is literally a zombie virus.
Also, it can be a trick.
Another one sounds pretty muchsoundsthe same."
So there's no need for food."
"There's, what, over a million people inside those camps?" said a soldier, extending a hand downwardsthere.
"Barring all the problems with so many people... how the hell are you going to feed so many people at a time? I mean, barring magic."
There, there was fire rising amongst the tents.
A man, with a fractured leg.
It was healed in an instant, the pain instantly fading.
The man bowed, then left back to his work.
A girl who had gotten a cut2 weeks agofrom a plant. That was 2 weeks ago, and now the wound had grown gangrenous.
Pacifica did her thing, substituting her ability with any kind of medicine or surgical tool,
realigning the coursing through his body and temporarily altering him,
2 weeks, no strenuous activity would be for the best.
Another man, with issues reminiscent of shock.
He had been locked up in solitary confinement for over a year, and had only now been recuperating due to prolonged human contact in the camp.
though how on earth you managed to train someone in an ability you yourself don't knowhow to, I would never understand."
Slaves become some fucker of a corporation took over our home planet, starved us out, and then put us into contracts that may have been chains."
"TITAN corporation. What a grand name, for a bunch of monsters.
And these weren't thelessworst cases.From what she could hear, this wasn't the worst.The worst were already all dead.
or even spears of fire-hardened tips.
The body fluids leaking out, were filled with a virus.
She will not try.
She shall.
prevent a full on suicide spree or revolt, were already starting up.
Fresh fish, clams, lobster,cookedseaweed, and jellyfish, were smoked, fried, or just eaten raw, the magic of Blazing Fire making them far more nutritious and palatable than what was natural.
The festivities were interrupted, as a massive bonfire of light erupted from the corner of the camp.
So anyway, @Mashadarof402 I got a thing.
Wait no. They aren't in Malfeas.If you're looking for ideas on how to bring in conflict, you can always run with the tensions boiling over already. A militia has been formed to purge the camp using long range bombardment methods to wipe out the plague.
Or since this is Malfeas, there's probably an infernal or two running around who'd probably take exception to a Solar wandering about. Or maybe not liking the fact that their plan to take out the encampment via the plague is being foiled by a walking lightbulb.
Up to you really, but it all depends on how much you want to ramp things up.
EDIT: Going to put the corrections and what not for the sidestory up later today. Currently busy.
They had been working since morning to afternoon, taking out interviews.
asked them to do shit.
Which was why they were here, in this shithole, talking to druggies and lowlives trying to figure out what had happened.
An entire day spent, traveling back and forth,
said Crowe, looking back at the notes.
"Well, the landlord said thattheaccess to the roof is always locked,
But for god's sake, its a friday,
"So what you've got there?" said the voice.
Seems that there're rumours of a doctor or some kind of group,
"There's been a school shooting. So far there's been 20 people killed! Good god, come over here, because I think this would require the entire department!"
Besides, its not like anybody dead has been reported. He'll do it another day.
She's working at the local K-mart. She's working often overtime, taking the same route; the same shortcut, through the abandoned sections of the city.
Black, dark, middle-aged, with a daughterthathe heard from the grapevine.
He was wearing a coat, for the winter.
His clothesThey were dark, plain, and unassuming, barely memorable at all.
The thirst was getting worst and worst.
She hadn't even looked back once, in her trip home, likely tired out from a day at work.
This dark andthisdesolate meant that whoever was here likely meant nothing good.
His voice choked out in achokedgasp,
as something resembling a rod of steel struck him in the solar plexus,
He bent over, knees weak, as his hands went to his abdomen, mouth gaping as if trying to grab the air that he now lacked.
A blow to the back of his head made him turn, stars momentarily shining as the pain nearly made him blanked out.
There, another figure, thathad suddenly crept behind him even as he turned around.
But that means... that means they were waiting for him. And that means....
Mike Angelo, murderer, serial killer, and suspect of the disappearance for several women,